


Be There

by Ellectrix



Series: Ever Since We Were Kids [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Best Friends, Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fire, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Grief/Mourning, Humanstuck, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing whilst asleep, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, secret kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-20
Updated: 2018-09-20
Packaged: 2019-07-14 20:34:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16048064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ellectrix/pseuds/Ellectrix
Summary: One moment could change everything.For Karkat, that one moment was when he came home from a pool party at the Peixes residence to find that he's one parent less than before.Dave was there to support him through it though.((Prequel to 'You Belong With Me' but can be read independently.))





	Be There

It was three years ago.

He remembers it as vividly as if it had just happened yesterday. Maybe he always will.

It was three years ago, and he remembers her walking out the door just like any other day. He had treated her like he usually does, with eyerolls and half hearted sincerity; he wasn’t the type to be openly affectionate to anyone. Not to his friends, not to his family, and especially not to his brother. Not even to his own mother.

He really regrets that now.

It was just like any other morning and she had kissed him on the forehead on her way out while he ate his breakfast. He had groaned and complained about how she should really stop doing that, he wasn’t five anymore. She had simply ruffled his hair and told him to stop being so crabby. An inside joke in their family from an earlier vacation to the beach involving crabs. He hated it.

But thinking back to it now, he finds the memory leaves a warm, fluffy feeling inside his chest.

After that, she left that morning in her pearly white scrubs, long bouncy dark brown hair tied up in a high ponytail. But in his memories, he can’t quite piece together what she looked like. He’s begun to forget, refusing to look at any photos of her to this day. He can’t quite remember the exact shape of her eyes, her nose, her eyebrows. But he can remember the curve of her smile. She always smiled so brightly, and Karkat couldn’t fathom how the woman was able to be so purely cheerful and produce a scowling son like him.

He remembers vividly the day his mother closed the door behind her and never returned home.

 

* * *

 

 

School was school. There was nothing worthy of noting about it. His day was spent toiling away in his classes like any other day, trying to ignore his best friend’s constant distractions. 

But he did have something worthy of retelling after school.

His friends had spontaneously all decided to hang out at Feferi’s house (more like mansion) after school, dragging him along, much to his dismay. He had texted his father where he was going on his way there.

They had all settled down in the Peixes backyard, where a giant pool sat around right smack dab in the middle. Everyone was milling about in their own splintered groups. Feferi, Kanaya, Nepeta, Aradia, Jade and Rose were sitting at the edge of the pool, chatting about girly shit while dipping their toes in the water. Roxy and Jane had disappeared somewhere in the house, offering to bake some pastries and fetch refreshments for the group. The rest of the group were crowded around a patio table, some cheering and some actually participating in the impromptu arm wrestling match. It mostly consisted of Equius breaking anyone’s hand who dares to go against him.

The raven haired teen and his shades toting friend were on the other side of the pool, opposite to the girls. The two were also sitting by the pool, shoes and socks discarded off to the side as they dipped their own feet into the cool water.

“I’m just saying, most romcoms have really shitty premises and literally almost all of the movies would be solved within the first ten-minute mark if they just had just _communicated_ with each other. Like jesus fuck, the amount of writers who overcomplicate shit by using miscommunication as a plot device is fucking ridiculous. It’s not even fun to watch, it’s mostly just frustrating as hell and the will-they-won't-they suspense is such bullshit. Like, no, it doesn't create tension, it just makes the characters look stupid as fuck.” Dave had rambled on. They were discussing the shittiness of Karkat’s taste in film once again. How they keep landing on this topic is a mystery to even Karkat himself. One moment, they’d be talking about the complexities of pulling off a successful murder and who they would off first if they could pull off said murder, then they’re suddenly playing fuck, marry, kill with Dave insisting that ‘kill all three’ isn't an option and Karkat calls bullshit on it, when suddenly, they’re arguing about why Karkat’s romcoms are actual shit with Karkat constantly correcting the blonde that ‘it’s not shit, it is _the_ shit’.

And like how this conversation usually goes, Karkat is rolling his eyes for what feels like the millionth time that day. “It’s not shitty, it’s _realistic_. Humans have a natural tendency to overcomplicate shit in general, especially in romantic situations where people are more likely to overthink and overanalyze every little detail. Plus, the hijinks that happens from miscommunication and misunderstandings create the most hilarious parts of the movie.” The dark haired teen had countered. “The way romcoms delve into the human psyche and love’s sometimes adverse effects to it are ten times more substantial than the mindless violence in your shitty action movies.”

“You are so full of shit, man.” Dave shoved the other with his shoulders. “The Matrix contains some pretty mind-blowing dilemmas and mature themes it explores throughout the three movies. It’s just twenty percent cooler than your boring romcoms with all the _genius_ action sequences.”

Again, _eyeroll_. “You call the idea of getting your brain uploaded into a virtual reality a valid human _dilemma_? It’s not even remotely relatable, I mean, how many of us are actually chosen ones destined to rebel against the system and rise up and lead a cyber rebellion to save humanity?” Karkat shoved the blonde back, harder this time.

“Fuck you, the threat of being trapped in a virtual reality is a totally plausible outcome in the future with how much technology is advancing at the rate it’s going. I mean, the movies call to attention your perception of reality. Who’s to say we’re not in a simulation right now?” Another shove. Looks like they’re now engaged in a shoving contest now.

“ _God_.” Karkat had simply answered like it was a definitive answer with no room for any argument at all. Truthfully, he just wants to piss the other off, he’s not even remotely religious.

“Don’t bring religion shit into this, ‘Kat.” Dave shoves Karkat hard enough that he actually almost falls into the pool. The dark haired male growled and glared daggers at the blonde, who’s got his ever present smirk plastered on his face.

“I can,” shove, “do whatever,” shove, “the _fuck_ ,” even more shoving, “I _want_.”

They’re actually wrestling at this point, using both their hands and arms to try and push the other into the pool.

Karkat loses the match and gets shoved into the pool.

Dave was laughing his ass off, almost falling backwards as Karkat resurfaced from the water. “Oh my fucking god Dave, you are the biggest piece of shit this world ever had the dismay of shitting out.”

“I’m not shit, Kitkat.” He grinned, pulling his shades down his nose so his wink can be visible to the other. “I am _the_ shit.”

In response, Karkat had splashed water on the blonde who cursed and attempted to crawl away from the side of the pool as fast as he can before the dark haired male soaked him even more with water.

Karkat slowly pulled himself up and off of the pool, grimacing at his current wet state. Then, his eyes widened as he remembered and tried to fish his phone from his pocket. “ _Oh my fucking god, fuck you so much right now, Strider."_

Strider was still off to the side, trying to stifle his laughter. “Why, what’s wrong?” He managed to get out in between his laughs as he crawled back to Karkat’s side.

His phone refused to open.

“Oh my god, _are you fucking serious right now_.”

“Oh shit, dude. Is it broken?”

Karkat shoved the dark screen of his phone into Dave’s face. “What the fuck do you think, fuck face?! You’re so going to fucking owe me for this shit, Dave.”

“Fuck. Man, I’m sorry, I didn’t know you had your phone on you. Damn.” He had apologized, giving an awkward sheepish grin. “You got me. I owe you. Just say the word and I’ll do whatever it is.”

His heart skipped a beat.

Karkat rolled his eyes, unable to stay mad at the blonde despite everything that had just happened. “Trust me, Strider. You’re going to regret those words.”

God. He’s really got it bad for Dave Strider.

 

* * *

 

 

It was fairly late into the afternoon when they had all decided to call it a day and go on their separate ways. Karkat had dried himself off with the help of Feferi’s hair dryer, although he still felt gross and sticky. Dave constantly apologized for what he did on their way home, and Karkat kept on telling him that it was fine. 

Once they finally made it, Dave had waved him goodbye as Karkat approached his porch while the blonde continued on his way on the sidewalk and into his own home.

Karkat had barely stepped inside the house when his father was on him in a tight embrace. He was too surprised to protest, and any words he had on his mind at the time died off when his father had pulled away and he realized that he was _crying_.

He spotted Kankri by the kitchen, face buried into his hands. Karkat could feel his stomach plummet to the soles of his feet.

He stared wide eyed at his father, dread swelling from his core at the question on his mind. “What happened?”

 

* * *

 

 

There was a fire at his mother’s workplace. Something about faulty wiring in one of the storage units, where it went unnoticed until it had grown substantially and ate through the building fast. By the time the firefighters arrived, the whole building was up in embers. 

Twenty-six people died in the fire. One hundred and thirty-one were injured with varying degrees of severity. His mother had been trapped in one of the rooms near where the fire had started.

They found her body once the fire was put out. She had died of carbon monoxide poisoning; smoke inhalation.

His father had called him multiple times and sent dozens of texts, none of which he received that day due to his phone being broken after it took a dip in the water.

Dave had been clueless as to why Karkat didn’t attend school that day. He only found out when he decided to pay the Vantas residence a visit, thinking that his best friend might have caught the flu or something and wasn’t able to tell him about it with his phone being broken and all.

Dave had rushed upstairs to his bedroom as soon as he was given permission to. The raven haired teen had been cocooned in his sheets on his bed when the blonde entered his room. It was pitch dark in his room, not a single light turned on and his window closed shut, blocking out the sun’s rays.

Still, he forged on once his eyes adjusted to the darkness of the room. He didn’t want to disturb him by opening any of the blinding lights.

“Karkat?” He had called out, taking cautious steps towards the lump on the bed. There was no sign of any movement at all.

When he got close enough, he slowly peeled back the covers to discover his best friend curled up in a fetal position, eyes half lidded. “Karkat?” He tried again and the boy bristled, his eyes flitting to Dave. Then, he slowly uncurled from himself and sat up, propping himself up with his arms.

Wordlessly, the blonde carefully wrapped his arms around the other, making sure to be aware of any sign that the other was uncomfortable. But he seemed to relax even more in his embrace, so Dave had shuffled more towards the bed to be closer to him.

They stayed like that for a while, although Karkat neither reciprocated nor pushed the hug away. He had simply rested his head against the blonde’s shoulders, staying completely still and quiet. The only noise in the room being their quiet breathing and synced heartbeats.

The blonde ran his fingers lightly through the other’s hair. He knew that if Karkat was this quiet, it meant that it was really bad. The short tempered teen was never this quiet.

Dave stayed by his best friend’s side for as long as he could. But he eventually had to go home.

He didn’t get very good sleep that night.

His mind was constantly on Karkat, and cursing himself for not knowing what or how to comfort him. He’s never seen him this _bad_ , and he doesn’t know what to do.

The best he can do is be there for him.

Karkat didn’t attend school again the following day. Turns out, he’s got two weeks off of school to grieve. Dave had to be the one to break the news ro their friends since Karkat has been isolating himself lately. Looked like he didn’t want company, something Dave understands.

Of course, everyone had heard about the fire at the hospital. But they weren’t aware how closely it affected them. Everyone had been worried about him, but the blonde had suggested to give him some space and that he’ll update them on their friend's status.

Dutifully, Dave visited the Vantas residence after school to check up on Karkat.

The dark haired male was still mostly unresponsive. Apparently, he hasn’t eaten anything either for the past three days. All of the food taken up to his room was left untouched while he’s curled up in his sheets, face hidden by a book.

This has the blonde worrying even more.

“Karkat, you need to eat.” He sighed exasperatedly, sitting at the foot of his bed with his arms crossed. His shades were sitting on the desk.

“I’m not hungry.” Was the answer he received. His voice was rougher around the edges from disuse. Karkat had barely spoken for the past week, and he seems to only reply to his family, Dave, and Kanaya. He doesn’t even talk to Terezi despite all of her efforts. Dave had brought some of their friends who wanted to see Karkat personally with him to visit a couple of times. But he mostly ignored them when others did visit.

“Can’t you just try to eat anyway? It’s been three days and we’re all worried about you.” Dave insisted, picking up the bowl of soup and pushing towards the raven haired boy. He simply blinked down at the warm food being offered to him and made no move to take it.

The blonde let out a huff. “I swear, I’ll actually feed you myself if you don’t do it yourself, Karkat.”

Still, the other simply blinked at him, slow and deliberate. “Why are you even here?” He suddenly asked, catching Dave off guard. It’s the first time he actually initiated a conversation on his own.

“Because I care about you?” He replied, the words coming out like a question. Dave licked his lips nervously and tried again. “I care about you.”

Karkat blinked a few times before pulling his legs close to his chest and resting his head on it sideways to look outside of his window. “No, you don’t.”

“Karkat-"

“No, you fucking don’t!” Karkat had cut the blonde off, snapping his head towards him with a pained expression on his face. Dave could feel his heart skip a beat, a strange burning feeling starting up in his chest.

It hurts to see him this way.

“Because if you did, if you really fucking cared about me, you would-" The dark haired boy spoke fast, only to cut himself off with a hiss, eyes wide, shoulders trembling. Then, slowly, slowly, he shut his eyes tight, brows furrowed, tears spilling down his cheeks. Big blobs of clear liquid shining starkly against his dark skin.

Dave couldn’t breathe for a moment, watching his friend, his best friend, slowly come undone in front of him. The burning sensation in his chest moved all over his body, turning into a stinging feeling he could feel everywhere. It felt like his heart was being squeezed tightly.

The feelings worsened at the noises the other made. Soft, strangled whimpering turning into wretched, noisy sobs. He curled in on himself, burying his face into his knees and shaking lightly.

It’s the first time he’s cried ever since the incident.

The blonde set the bowl of soup down and cautiously moved closer. Hesitantly, he put a hand on his back and slowly rubbed in circular motions. Eventually, he ended up having his arms around the other once again. He felt every single quiver of the smaller figure in his arms as he cried and cried and cried.

He didn’t get very good sleep again that night.

Karkat’s words echoed in his head. “If you really cared about me, you would-"

Would what?

He had forgotten about it at the time, the fact that his best friend was brokenly weeping in front of him moving to the forefront of his mind. But now, in the dim amber light of his bedroom, the scenes replayed in his head again and again.

“What did you mean?” He whispered quietly to himself as if somehow, the answer would suddenly come to him. But of course, nothing happened. Dave sighed and turned his head towards his window, staring at the opposite window belonging to the grey eyed teen.

He wonders what terrible things could be lurking in the other’s head. Suddenly, he finds a heavy dread settling in the pit of his stomach at the thought.

He blinked several times, mind swirling with a hurricane of thoughts. He felt… Odd. He couldn’t quite place a name on what he was feeling, just that he really wished he could just take all of the other’s fears, worries, and pain and place them into a bottle before throwing it far far away.

He felt the strangest need to hold him and protect him from everything.

The blonde shook his head, willing the bizarre thoughts of possessiveness away.

He heaved a heavy sigh and pulled his sheets over his head. He really should get some sleep. He’s still got school tomorrow.

 

* * *

 

 

“If you really cared about me, you would-"

That was such a stupid thing to say.

Karkat lay awake in his dark bedroom, unaware that just a few meters across the street, the blonde was much in the same state as him.

The events earlier that day kept repeating in his head.

“If you really cared about me, you would-"

_You would kiss me and tell me everything will be alright._

It was selfish.

It was selfish, stupid, and so, so wrong. Sure, he was upset and grieving and he felt like dying, but he couldn’t,- _shouldn’t_ -, use it to take advantage of his best friend to get what he wanted.

Of course Dave cared about him. Why is he asking for more when his friend was already giving him everything he could give? 

Selfish. 

Selfish.

Selfish. Selfish. _Selfish_.

He should’ve kept his mouth shut.

He closed his eyes. He could feel still feel his warmth surrounding him, his caring caresses, and steady heartbeat.

It still leaves the raven haired teen breathless.

He could feel tears stinging the corners of his eyes once again. His mother would’ve comforted him, teased him about his stupid little crush. Told him stories about when she and his dad first started dating, told him something about falling in love. But now, she was gone and he never once told her before how much he really appreciated everything she did despite his constant complaining.

She was gone.

She was gone.

_She was gone._

The idea of it was still so hard to cope with. Every day felt like something was missing, a crucial part of his life that he didn’t know was so important in the first place. Something he’d only noticed once it was gone, leaving a gaping hole wide open in its place.

And what was worse was the fact that he still can’t forgive himself for that day. For not coming home in time to be with his own family when they received the news. He had spent it oblivious laughing at an impromptu pool party at the Peixes.

_Selfish._

The word kept repeating in his mind.

_All you’ve ever been is fucking selfish._

Karkat took in deep, shallow breaths. He felt like a lead weight had been placed on his chest and he was finding it hard to breathe. He shifted to lie on his side, pulling the covers tightly over his body and smothering his tears with his pillow.

He cried himself to sleep for the first time since she died.

 

* * *

 

 

The funeral occurred that weekend. All of his friends and other family friends came to the burial. 

It was a clichéd cloudy day when it happened. But thankfully, it didn’t rain at all. Everyone was in varying shades of blacks and greys and Dave had ditched his shades completely for the occasion. Somehow, he found it rude to be wearing them to such a solemn and serious event.

Although he cried, he had separated himself from the gathered crowd when he did. Dave had always not been one for showing any emotion except to those he trusted with his whole heart. He hadn’t realized it until he saw her in a glowing white dress, eyes closed as if she had just been sleeping. The reality of it all only hit him right then and there. His mind had been so occupied on how to help his best friend that he never noticed it.

The woman had become a sort of mother figure even to him. Of course, she would be. He’s known her for almost just as long as Karkat had, and he’d spent countless sleepovers at the Vantas residence that she actually almost felt like his own mother.

It was a crushing realization to the blonde who was not prepared for the assault it would do to his own heart. And it was only worsened by the thought that Karkat was experiencing something similar, except it was so much more prominent. And would no doubt last longer than his own current feelings. He had seen the closeness of the two himself and he was even more keenly aware of the pain Karkat must’ve been feeling right now.

He had run off to walk around on his own around the cemetery, sniffling and trying to keep his tears from falling but failing miserably.

He left fairly early of the event. He didn’t know whether Karkat cried or not. He didn’t know if he would’ve even wanted his company through the process anyway.

Suddenly he felt selfish for leaving him all alone just because he didn’t want the others seeing him cry without his shades.

After her coffin was lowered six feet under, all of the guests had moved back to the Vantas residence to offer each of their own condolences to the family. But as soon as they got there, Karkat had made his way upstairs and locked himself in his room once again.

Kanaya had followed after him, and Dave decided to let the girl try and comfort him. Kanaya had always been better at consoling Karkat than he ever was, despite knowing the other more intimately.

“Dave,” He had decided to spend his time outside, sitting around on the porch and thinking when she had approached. Rose took careful steps down the stairs and took a seat beside him. She placed a hand on his shoulder, squeezing lightly and making the blonde let out a sigh. “How’re you holding up?”

Dave couldn’t help it; a bitter laugh bubbled up from inside of him. “Why are you asking me? I’m not the one who lost their mother today.”

Rose levelled him a look, one he couldn’t stand to see, so he averted his eyes to the wooden steps underneath him. “I saw you leave at the ceremony.”

“So?”

She patted his back, and a wave of guilt ran through him. He grimaced. “I know she meant something to you too. You need comforting just like anyone here today.”

“Karkat has it worse.” Was the only reply he could give.

“That doesn’t invalidate your own feelings.” His cousin had countered, keeping her hand on his back. “I can’t offer any words to make this easier. The least I can do is be there for you. As you have been there for him throughout all this time.”

Rose scooted closer to him and rested her head on his shoulder. Dave didn’t shrug her off but didn’t offer a reply either. He simply closed his eyes and sighed, resting his head over hers and allowed her presence to comfort him. Aside from Karkat, Rose knew just as well.

He wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but eventually, Rose had stood up and told him that she and the others will be waiting inside whenever he’s ready to go back in. The blonde stood up from his perch on the porch and decided he should go see how Karkat’s doing. He refused to stew in his own misery. He needs to be there for his best friend.

Dave passed by John on his way upstairs, who gave him a sympathetic smile. He simply gave the blue eyed boy a tight nod. John continued to make his way to Mister Vantas who was currently talking to his Bro. He’s no doubt going to offer his own condolences. Pitied words and sympathies is what this house is currently full of.

When he made it to the door, Terezi had just come out, closing the door behind her. Looks like she’s had her own fair share of tears. “Dave.” She acknowledged with a nod, a hand still on the door knob.

“How is he?” He questioned, voice soft and quiet. The house was eerily so.

The ginger haired girl ducked her head, letting go of the door knob. “He’s…” She started, seemingly struggling with her words. “He’s not… dealing with it well. I mean, he refuses to talk. Or acknowledge anyone.”

“What about Kanaya?”

Terezi shrugged. “I talked to her and all she said was that he didn’t say a word to her either. She knows none of us can really do anything to make any of this any better. But I thought I’d give it my best shot.”

Dave nodded and reached for the door when Pyrope caught the sleeve of the black suit he was wearing. He raised an eyebrow at her and she gave him her signature smile.

“I’m glad Karkat has a friend like you to look after him. I know how much effort you’re putting in to be there for him from the very start. It’s… Admirable.” Is all she said before she turned around and descended the stairs.

He stared after her retreating form for a few moments before turning his attention back to the close door. He twisted the knob and pushed it open, knocking whilst he did so to make his presence known before he entered.

The dark haired teen was sitting on his bed, facing the window. He had a far away look to his eyes with heavy eye bags underneath them. Heavier than usual.

Wordlessly, he moved to join him on the bed and look out the window with him. He sat just close enough to let the other know he was present without explicitly touching him.

The grey clouds outside moved at a snail’s pace, covering the sun completely. Everything around them had a gloomy atmosphere, with the colours around them feeling faded and dull. The room was quiet, in a comfortable way. The silence was a welcome company at the moment.

Time passed between them with either saying a word but both of them being comfortable by simply being with each other’s presence. Dave’s mind was wandering around, remembering pasts long gone as he stared up at the patch of sky he could see from where they were currently sitting at. He knew there was nothing he could say that hasn’t already been said to him multiple times already by all of their other friends. So, he stayed quiet and simply offered his company.

Rose did it for him and it made him feel better. He hopes he can do the same for Karkat.

“I remember,” Karkat had spoken up suddenly, catching the blonde’s attention. He glanced at the shorter one, watching his strangely calm and serene expression as he continued to stare out the window. “When we were kids, and you slept over and stayed for breakfast, she would always cook us chocolate chip filled pancakes. She’d always bring out the fruits and whipped cream and we’d make stupid funny faces on our pancakes.”

Dave looked back out at the sky, making a quiet hum of acknowledgement. “I remember it.” He smiled at the memory. “I remember getting a lecture from her when I drew a dick on mine with the whipped cream, but she kept giggling and laughing that neither of us could actually take her seriously.”

Karkat actually laughs at that, something he hasn’t heard in what feels like a very long time despite it only being just a week. Sure, it was just a light chuckle, but it was something. It made his chest feel lighter.

“You were a little shit back then. You still are.” The dark haired teen commented.

“Like you’re one to talk.” Dave countered. “Remember when we were seven and it was winter time? You thought it would be a fun idea to bring in snow from outside and have a snowball fight right in the middle of the living room, using the couch and pillows as forts. She had us mopping the floor and cleaning the house the rest of the day.”

The blonde glanced at the other once more to see him grinning slightly. “And you were fully on board with it, dumbass. We were both little shits.” He admits.

They both laughed lightly. “Remember when you wanted to be a tattoo artist and had the bright idea to use coloured pens and markers to draw on my skin as ‘practice’, and I ended up getting scolded and a long time out in the corner for covering for you and saying that it was my idea?” Karkat continued, recounting more of their days as children. Dave nodded.

“Or when we were sliding down the stairs with sleds and tried to lie our way out of it because we thought she’d be against it because it was dangerous, only for her to join in and slide down with us?” Dave added, his smile broadening.

“Or when she would have story time with us when we were four and Kankri was dragged into it, whining about how he's too old for it but ended up enjoying it nonetheless?” Laughter could be heard in his tone of voice, and a strange swelling feeling bloomed in the blonde’s chest.

“Or how she made it a contest on who can finish their glass of milk gets an extra cookie to coax us into finishing our glasses before bed?” He stared at the other, smile faltering when he found the other crying despite the laughter bubbling from him. “Karkat?”

The only response he received was a broken sob as the other lifted his hands from his lap to brush roughly at his face, trying to wipe away the tears that kept on flowing out. The blonde hesitantly reached out, putting a hand on his shoulder.

“She’s gone.” He had simply croaked out, voice scratchy and so, so vulnerable. “ _She’s gone, Dave_.”

He had pulled the dark haired male to him at that moment, feeling his own tears prickle at the corners of his eyes. He took in deep breaths- he had to be strong to be there for his friend.  “I know.” He had mumbled, burying his face in the mass of black hair in front of him. “I know. I’ll be here for as long as you need me.”

“Will you stay with me-" Karkat managed to get out in between the quick short breaths he was taking.

“Of course.” Was his immediate reply.

“Will you stay the night with me?” He finished, burying his head further into the crook of Dave’s neck. “I-I… I don’t think I can handle being _alone_. I don’t want to be _alone_.”

The blonde patted his back. “Of course.”

 

* * *

 

 

Karkat fell asleep soon after. Dave had carefully shifted the teen in his arms onto the bed without waking him up. Now he leaned his head against the headboard of the bed, silently sitting beside the sleeping form beside him. He had been staring at the grey walls of the bedroom for however long. 

He promised he’s stay. So he will.

The blonde’s eyes shifted from the walls to the ceiling, then to the windows. It was progressively getting darker and darker outside and he idly wondered if there were still visitors and guests downstairs. Their friends should still be there, probably continuing to offer their comforts to the family.

His eyes flitted to Karkat. The male had his eyes closed peacefully, not a single wrinkle of worry, sadness, or pain on his face. He silently examined his friend, seemingly unable to take his eyes off of him. The rhythmic rise and fall of his chest that reminded him that he was alive, the long dark lashes casting shadows on his cheeks, his slender fingers that twitched on the mattress every now and then, the curve of his lips as it was opened slightly-

His breath hitched.

Dave quickly tore his gaze away from him and closed his eyes. _What the hell is wrong with you?_ A silent voice crept into his head. _He’s your best bro. Your pal. Your best friend._

But he found himself looking back at the other, fingers curling into a fist on either side of him. He shifted from his position on the bed, propping himself up on his elbows and faced the dark haired teen.

Whatever compelled him to do what he did, he has no idea. All he knew was that he found himself thinking _how would it feel if I kissed him right now? Would it be soft?_ And as if the filter in his mind that’s supposed to stop him from doing such idiotic things had been turned off because he found himself leaning down to test that theory out.

And before he knew it, he’s got his lips pressed up against his friend’s. It was just a quick peck, but he found his heart beating at a hundred miles per hour afterwards. He was quick to pull away, eyes widening at what he had just done.

The other shifted in his bed, brows furrowing into a frown. Dave’s heart suddenly stopped and he held his breath as he anticipated whether or not the other would wake up from what he did. A thousand excuses ran through his mind at that moment in case he did wake up.

But to his great relief, Karkat simply shifted in his sleep before continuing on his deep slumber.

Everything was fine. Nobody saw it and he could just pretend nothing ever happened.

Until he heard the quiet click of the door. His eyes immediately flitted across the room, heart hammering in his chest again. He looked back at Karkat once before slipping out of bed. It was fine if he left for a couple of minutes, he wasn’t breaking his promise if he intended to come back.

He crossed the room to the door and quickly opened it up to find the retreating form of one ginger haired girl down the stairs. He hissed and silently closed the door behind him, walking briskly to catch up to the other. When they were finally down on the steps of the staircase, he reached out and caught Pyrope’s wrist. The blind girl whirled around to face him as if she had been expecting this.

She was smiling in that wide creepy way she always does. “It’s not what you think-” He found himself saying almost immediately.

The girl simply continued to smile at him. “It’s not what I think _what_ , mister cool kid?” Her voice had an air of mirth to it.

He grits his teeth. “I didn’t-" He stops himself, unsure how to actually explain what he just did as he stared at the blind girl.

“You didn’t what?” She pressed grin widening. If that was even possible at this point.

He lets out an explosive sigh and reached up to run his hand through his hair. Terezi crossed her arms. “Look, if you’re worried I’ll start to spread rumours about this, I won’t. How dare you even think I would ever stoop so low to something like that, Strider. Shame on you.”

“I never said I thought you would tell others about it.” He murmured. “Can you just pretend you didn’t see anything? I don’t even know why the fuck I did what I did. I regret it now.”

Terezi’s eyes seemingly soften. She reached out to touch his arm. “It’s okay. You don’t have to feel shameful about what you did. You were just curious, I get it." She shrugged. “A lot of people are curious about what it would be like to kiss a Vantas.” She added with a wink.

“I’m not-”

She rolled her eyes. “Yes, you’re not gay, I get it. But who really gives a shit about that? Literally, most of our friends are fucking queer, Dave. Get over yourself.”

He clenched his jaw and looked away, clenching and unclenching his hands. “He’s my best friend.”

The blind girl pats his shoulder. “It’s fine. I know you’re not ready yet. Besides, we’re still young. You might change your mind later down the road.”

He opened his mouth to say something, what it was he was not sure, but the girl had already turned around and joined the crowd in the living room. He stood at the bottom of the steps by himself, unsure what had just happened.

With a frustrated growl, he ruffled his hair roughly and covered his face with his hands.

What was he doing with his life?

 

* * *

 

 

Karkat woke up hours later to find his best bro passed out beside him. Although all he can see was his dim outline. He had stayed just like he promised. 

He looked out the window and found clear skies with the full moon shining down brightly, silver slivers of light spilling into his room. He glanced at his clock. It was one thirty-six in the morning.

He stared at the clock for a while, blinking blearily. Faded memories came to him in snippets and he had a little trouble discerning the dream from reality.

Karkat reached up to touch his lips.

He remembers being kissed.

By none other than his best friend.

The thought brings heat to his cheeks. He glanced over at Dave, heart pounding in his chest. He wasn’t sure if it had actually happened or if he had simply dreamt it up. But the pressure on his lips had felt so real.

But it was too good to be true, he decided. Dave was straight, there’s no way he would’ve kissed him in his sleep like some clichéd scene in one of his romcoms.

It was a wonderful dream to have though.


End file.
